Oh, how abundant is your goodness,
which you have stored up for those who fear you
and worked for those who take refuge in you,
in the sight of the children of mankind! - Psalm 31:19
The fear of God is the fear of straying from Him which leads us back toward Him. Fearing God is a longing for God and a sense of desperation at the thought of not finding our shelter in Him. I owe some of this articulation to an article by John Piper.
It is, then an entirely different understanding of fear and a unique response. Instead of being repelled, we are drawn.
It is comparable to my understanding of the wrath of God.
In my study of scripture, the wrath of God is less of an overt reaction to human stubbornness, self-will, and sin than an encounter between opposites. An object of intense velocity encounters an object of strong resistance.
Sometimes, God is the wall against which our stubborn determination to sin is halted.
Sometimes, our will is the wall that God's unstoppable force topples. Either way, God, and truth win ... and that is essence of His wrath. He wins.
God is the unmovable object and the unstoppable force.
To the one fearing Him and trusting Him, it is a source of great comfort, but to the one resisting, it is quite disconcerting and potentially disastrous.
It is always a choice of alignment.
"The fear of the Lord, the gift of the Holy Spirit, doesn’t mean being afraid of God, since we know that God is our Father that always loves and forgives us,...[It] is no servile fear, but rather a joyful awareness of God’s grandeur and a grateful realization that only in him do our hearts find true peace.” - Pope Francis (Harris, Elise. "Pope: Fear of the Lord an alarm reminding us of what's right", Catholic News Agency, June 11, 2014)
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Frederick Buechner in The Magnificent Defeat:
God is the enemy whom Jacob fought there by the river, of course, and whom in one way or another we all of us fight—God, the beloved enemy, because, before giving us everything, he demands of us everything. Remember Jacob, limping home against the great conflagration of dawn. Remember Jesus, staggering on broken feet out of the tomb toward the Resurrection, bearing on his body the proud insignia of the defeat which is victory, the magnificent defeat of the human soul at the hands of God.
Bless us, O God, that we may see your hand not only in the wonders of the world, but in its pain, and ours. Amen.
